I post in the forum. But maybe can get conflict. I just relate it to psychology. Here. Many reaction can occur. But this can help you to settle it.

Tips for Resolving Conflict Online

What can be done to prevent unnecessary conflict in cyberspace? The following are tips for handling conflict online with respect, sensitivity, and care:

Don?t respond right away

When you feel hurt or angry about an email or post, it?s best not to respond right away. You may want to write a response immediately, to get it off your chest, but don’t hit send! Suler recommends waiting 24 hours before responding - sleep on it and then reread and rewrite your response the next day.

Read the post again later

Sometimes, your first reaction to a post is a lot about how you’re feeling at the time. Reading it later, and sometimes a few times, can bring a new perspective. You might even experiment by reading it with different tones (matter-of-fact, gentle, non-critical) to see if it could have been written with a different tone in mind than the one you initially heard.

Discuss the situation with someone who knows you

Ask them what they think about the post and the response you plan to send. Having input from others who are hopefully more objective can help you to step back from the situation and look at it differently. Suler recommends getting out of the medium in which the conflict occurred - in this case talking to someone in person - to gain a better perspective.

Choose whether or not you want to respond

You do have a choice, and you don?t have to respond. You may be too upset to respond in the way that you would like, or it may not be worthy of a response. If the post is accusatory or inflammatory and the person?s style tends to be aggressive or bullying, the best strategy is to ignore them.

Assume that people mean well, unless they have a history or pattern of aggression

Everyone has their bad days, gets triggered, reacts insensitively, and writes an email without thinking it through completely. It doesn?t mean that they don?t have good intentions.

On the other hand, some people pick fights no matter how kind and patient you are with them. They distort what you say, quote you out of context, and make all sorts of accusations all to vilify and antagonize you. Don’t take the “bait” by engaging in a struggle with them - they’ll never stop. Sometimes, the best strategy is to have nothing more to do with someone.

Clarify what was meant

We all misinterpret what we hear and read, particularly when we feel hurt or upset. It?s a good idea to check out that you understood them correctly. For example, you could ask, ?When you said…did you mean…or, what did you mean by…?? Or, ?when you said…I heard…is that what you meant?? Often times, what we think someone said is not even close to what they meant to say. Give them the benefit of the doubt and the chance to be clear about what they meant.

Think about what you want to accomplish by your communication

Are you trying to connect with this person? Are you trying to understand them and be understood? What is the message you hope to convey? What is the tone you want to communicate? Consider how you can convey that.

Verbalize what you want to accomplish

Here are some examples, ?I want to understand what you?re saying.? ?I feel hurt by some stuff that you said. I want to talk about it in a way that we both feel heard and understood.? ?I want to find a way to work this out. I know we don?t agree about everything and that?s okay. I?d like to talk with you about how I felt reading your post.? ?I hope we can talk this through because I really like you. I don?t want to be argumentative or blaming.?

Use ?I? statements when sharing your feelings or thoughts

For example, ?I feel…? versus ?You made me feel…?

Use strictly feeling statements

Feeling statements include saying you felt hurt, sad, scared, angry, happy, guilty, remorseful, etc. In everyday conversations, we describe our feelings differently than this. For example, we say that we felt ?attacked?, ?threatened?, ?unsafe?, or ?punched in the stomach?. When the person we?re upset with is not present, or able to read our words, this is an understandable way to express the full depth of our feelings and experience. Generally though, these statements are not simply feeling statements because they contain within them unexpressed beliefs. For example, you believe that you were attacked by the person, not that it just felt that way. If you want to communicate with the person involved (or they can read your words), it is best to stick to simple feeling statements otherwise they will hear you as accusing them of attacking them and be angry or upset with you. Some people get confused why other people get upset with them when they think they are only expressing their feelings; usually in these cases there were unstated beliefs expressed which the person reacted to.

Choose your words carefully and thoughtfully, particularly when you?re upset

Do your best to keep in mind that the person will read your post alone. You are not physically or virtually present with them to clarify what you meant, and they can?t see the kindness in your eyes. They must rely entirely on your words to interpret your meaning, intent, and tone. This is why it?s important to choose your words carefully and thoughtfully. You can still be real and honest while being selective.

Place yourself in the other person?s shoes

How might they hear your message? To avoid unnecessary conflict or a lot of hurt feelings, it helps to take into account who you?re writing to. One person might be able to hear you say it exactly how you think it, and another person would be threatened by that style of communication. Think about the other person when writing your email or post. Do your best to communicate in a way that is respectful, sensitive, and clear to them. People often say, to do that feels like they?re being controlled and why shouldn?t they just write it the way they want to. Of course you can write it any way you want, especially online, but if you want to communicate with this person and have them hear and understand what you?re saying, it helps to think about how they will hear it.

Use emoticons to express your tone

In online communication, visual and auditory cues are replaced by emoticons, for example, smiles, winks, and laughter. It helps to use emoticons to convey your tone. Additionally, if you like the person, tell them! Having a conflict or misunderstanding doesn?t mean you don?t like the person any more, but people often forget that reality, or don?t think to say it. It may be most needed during a tense interaction.

Start and end your post with positive, affirming, and validating statements

Say what you agree with, what you understand about how they feel, and any other positive statements at the beginning of your email. This helps set a positive tone. End on a positive note as well.

Reference: Here

The most intelligent presidents in U.S. history haven’t necessarily excelled in the job, and their brain power might be the culprit, says U.S. Circuit Judge Richard Posner. Intelligence actually can be a disadvantage in positions of authority, says Mr. Posner on his blog, which he co-writes with economist Gary Becker. “Franklin Roosevelt, Harry Truman, Dwight Eisenhower and Ronald Reagan were not as bright as Herbert Hoover, Richard Nixon, Jimmy Carter or Bill Clinton,” he says, but nevertheless were better presidents.

http://blogs.wsj.com/informedreader/2007/06/18/a-possible-reason-why-dumber-presidents-do-better/

Intelligence give you extra to think further than it can occur. May be you can control it by slow it down and think carefully.

1: Rephrase Questions

2: Pause, Don’t Trip

3: Write Out the Tricky Parts

4: Watch Your Apologies

5: Don’t Distract With Powerpoint

http://ririanproject.com/2007/05/05/5-powerful-hacks-to-immediately-improve-your-presentations/

1. Reviewed by Debi Winson-Buzil

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Ty Burhoe’s Invocation is one sweet listen. Moving between prayer and instrumental, this recording captures a feeling of deep devotion. Featuring yoga luminaries Krishna Das and John Friend (the founder of anusara yoga), this mantra opens all anusara yoga classes. Its melody was crafted by Krishna Das, with John Friend, one summer night in Utah as a way for students to remember the prayer, as well as a means to stay connected to the prayer’s essence. This mantra is also used in opening prayers within the siddha yoga and Sivananda yoga traditions.

Introducing yogini Amy Ippoliti and Sanskrit scholar Manorama, Invocation is a free-flowing, hour-long exploration of the maha mantra that begins “Om Namah Sivaya Gurave.” Using acoustic instruments, including sarangi, sarod, piano, drones and Western strings, the recording is mellow without stepping into “new-age” territory. The melodies and vocals are delightful and production qualities high; this is great music to practice yoga, meditation or bodywork to.

The Siva mantras embody Divine Consciousness itself, and this mantra is quite powerful and quite lovely:

“Om Namah Sivaya Gurave
Sat-Chid-Ananda Murtaye
Nishprapanchaya Shantaya
Niralambaya Tejase.”

Invocation reflects the beauty and knowledge that we all have within us. Whether exploring the theme through the prayer itself, or through the intermittent instrumental tracks, listening to this music raises us up. Goodness can be replaced by guru, and there you have it—the inner teacher that resides within, always available.

Ty’s music is wise and studied, yet wild like the wind. He has been a student of the great tabla maestro Ustad Zakin Hussain since 1990. I first encountered Ty in the 90’s playing tabla with Curandero, a Flamenco trio on tour from Colorado to the Heartland Café, which is, literally, one of Chicago’s oldest roots venues. I loved what I heard. In perusing his discography, I found that Ty has accompanied so many luminaries, from Krishna Das to Bela Fleck, moving through many different musical styles. He’s also featured on the Academy Award-winning “Born into Brothels” soundtrack. It’s wonderful to see Ty emerge with his own set—a fantastic well-conceived exploration of the goodness and the light within.

Ty Burhoe will be in Chicago on March 7 for a special concert at Moksha Yoga Center (mokshayoga.com). Check out Ty’s website for more info: tyburhoe.com. Om Namah Sivaya!

Debi Winston-Buzil is a music lover and yogini, a devotee of Holy Mother and a devoted mother of two young children. She is the founder of Chicago’s own kirtan group, Devi 2000, which has just released their second CD, “Prepare Your Soul to Dance.” Check them out at devi2000.com, or visit myspace.com/ devi2000 for free downloads. Devi 2000 will lead kirtan at Moksha Yoga, 700 N. Carpenter, Chicago, Saturday, March 17 and April 7, at 7:30 p.m. Donation is $10.

By Jacqui Neurauter

Much has been written in recent years about using the power of our intentions to create a better life. We’ve all had aspirations, goals and resolutions that fell flat, whether we intended to lose weight, get a better job, create wealth, find a good mate or change bad habits. From what research is discovering today, however, we all have the capacity to manifest our own unique greatness when we incorporate simple mental techniques. Many of these techniques are ardently employed in the world of sports.

Remember prizefighter Mohamed Ali, who constantly recited rhyming couplets as though they were mantras? Then he would top it off with a self-confirming, “I am the greatest!” Not only did he convince himself of his imminent success, but undoubtedly he convinced his opponents as well.

We love to see our sports figures and teams achieve great feats. Many of them train their minds to win; mental techniques are used to self-motivate and to imagine and rehearse difficult plays. More than employing mere visualization and maintaining positive thoughts, star athletes and teams actually “feel” the entire process of their imminent experience in their whole being before they physically perform it. By performing a virtual mental trial run, they work out the glitches or specific aspects of the play. Moreover, they rehearse the steps again and again, including their ultimate victory.

Change your thoughts
In a new book, The Intention Experiment: Using Your Thoughts to Change Your Life and the World (published by Free Press, January 2007), author Lynne McTaggart describes recent brain research that has shown that electrical activity in the brain is the same whether we’re thinking about doing something or actually doing it. Thoughts then can create brain pathways that make carrying out a challenging feat easier. The more we use mental techniques to establish the pathways, the easier it is to produce the desired outcome.

Also, mental rehearsals can actually produce physiological changes. In one study, one group of individuals did a weight-lifting workout, while another group merely sat in chairs and imagined lifting weights. The first group increased muscle mass by 30%. Surprisingly, those in the second group also increased muscle–by about half as much as the first group.

The mental rehearsals used by athletes are also effective in treating illness. Patients with a variety of chronic and acute conditions have boosted the effects of their treatment by using mental images to fight the illness and/or rebalance their bodies. The so-called placebo effect is well documented: many patients taking a sugar pill or inert substance who believe they are receiving a powerful treatment experience the same relief and side effects as those actually taking the drug.

Mastering the process
Based on these findings, we can enhance our own lives by employing these intentional techniques. They can be used in planning our day, establishing long-range goals and handling most of life’s challenges. Here are several tips to help you master some useful mental practices.

1. Create the time and space. It can be first thing in the morning, before you go to bed or whatever time works for you.
2. Set the stage. Lay out all the components of the process, seeing each one vividly.
3. Run through the motions. Allow your mental imagery to move you from one step to the next and to work out glitches and challenges along the way.
4. Feel the experience. Utilize all your senses: seeing, hearing, touching, smelling, emotions. Put your whole heart into it.
5. Imagine the outcome. Feel the victory, the rush of adrenalin, joy of accomplishment or praise from observers or recipients.
6. Repeat, repeat. Each rehearsal brings more clarity and depth to the experience, setting pathways that become easier to travel along in real time.

One of the most important things we can all learn from athletes is how to block out images that represent doubt. They train themselves to edit these thoughts out of their experience. Doubt and worry put up roadblocks. When our pathways, whether neural or actual, are lined with harmony, joy and peace, we create a better world for ourselves and for those around us with less effort.

Jacqui Neurauter, of Harmonious Pathways, is a Personal/Professional Coach and Ethical Wills Specialist. Call 847.359.6391 or visit www.harmoniouspathways.com to sign up to receive a free E-newsletter or complimentary coaching session and to learn about upcoming presentations and workshops, including “Empower Your Life with Coaching,” “What’s Next in Your Life” “Mastering Act Three,” “Downsizing for the Good Life” and “Sharing Your Spiritual Legacy.